How many of you have sat in a plane and during the safety instructions have tuned out saying to yourself, I have heard this so many times, I know this so I don’t need to listen.
Yes I have done this too and not only about safety instructions. I was told as a child that it was selfish to think of yourself that happiness was about making sure others were happy. I made that mean that I was responsible for other people’s happiness and spent so many years putting other people’s needs first before mine. In fact I didn’t know what my needs were.
What this meant was I became a people pleaser. I am now a recovering people pleaser having learnt that we are only responsible for our own happiness.
So what makes you happy? Are you living a life you want? Self-awareness is 95% of the answer. What is it that stops people being who they want and to live the life they want. Fear
Fear is hard wired into every human being; nothing we do today or in our lifetime will take fear away. The secret is learning how to use fear instead of letting fear use you.
What controls our lives are the meanings we associate to everything in our lives, which are shaped by how we view our world (the beliefs and values we have created) For example two people may experience the same event, one person may think this is so horrible I am being punished, I might as well die and some one else may think, even though this isn’t something I wanted I am being challenged, its an opportunity to change, it’s a gift. The perceptual difference affects the quality of each person’s life and what action they take next.
Once we have established a meaning they are driven by our individual patterns of emotions. We all have patterns of emotions. For example, we all know people we like to be around because they always seem happy and others who seem to be continuously frustrated, sad or angry. These emotions are driven by how you use your physical body (your breathing, posture, movement), whatever you focus on, you will feel and the language you use. As soon as you put words to an experience, it changes the meaning you experience.
